For many spectators, the most missed presence at the coronation of King Charles III next month will not be that of Meghan, duchess of Sussex, but the late Diana, princess of Wales. In inevitably dreary propinquity to Charles will be the woman soon to be known as the former queen consort and Britain’s newest crowned queen, Camilla — a woman who plays the long game, and is now accepted by most Britons if not universally loved. 

Of course, securing that title will not make her monarch, something that can only be inherited. But as it turns out, it is a bit of royal ceremony that the duchess of Sussex is standing on that will keep her away from the pomp at London, and little else. 

It is certainly not because she needs to stay at home in California to fête the birthday of her son, Prince Archie of Sussex, who turns 4 on May 6 — the very day the king will be crowned at Westminster Abbey. If one can afford to live in a $15 million mansion, chances are it is not a Herculean task to find a spare seat on a private jet. Or a babysitter, for that matter. 

As it turns out, the curtsey’s the thing that catches the thinking of the self-styled queen of Montecito: Meghan, duchess of Sussex, finds bobbing a curtsy to be an antiquated act mainly worthy of derision. Her mockery of the curtsey she was expected to execute before Her Majesty, the late Queen Elizabeth II, was one of the most widely publicized clips from the Netflix documentary, “Harry & Meghan.” There is no walking back from a command performance like that one. 

Ms. Markle’s quizzical failure to comprehend how brash  public-facing scorn for the centuries-old traditions of America’s closest ally could be perceived as a slow-burning form of effrontery did not stop Buckingham Palace from inviting her and her husband, Prince Harry, to London for the once-in-a-lifetime event, even if the invite did come via e-mail. 

British cheer prevails over American jeer, you might say. 

But what really rankles the duchess is not the perceived slights that bowing (well, curtseying) to institutionalized rituals represented in the past, at least in her view, but the prospect of having to repeat them. This, more than the so-called Buckingham Palace balcony snub, is reportedly more grating because of the very conspicuous action that it would require. To wit, that is bending a knee before Catherine, princess of Wales. Possibly more than once. 

Simply put, royal protocol calls for curtsies to those of higher rank. And there is no Hollywood magic potent enough to undo the stark fact that Meghan is outranked by her sister-in-law, with whom she famously does not get along. Even if she were not to encounter Catherine on the royal balcony she surely would elsewhere. Better to skulk at home than to seethe within while millions of people tune in to watch your every scripted move. 

The reasons for the rift between the royal ladies may be difficult to untangle, but they are real. The princess of Wales was said to find the walkabout with Harry and Meghan following the death of Elizabeth to be exceedingly awkward for her — and Kate is not a woman given to complaining.  

One need not be a diehard royal watcher or fan of Hello! Magazine to recognize the depth of affection the British have developed for Kate. She is a woman who embraced her role as a working royal rather than running away from it. 

Meghan is not one who likes to be outshone, but she never understood that being second in line does not necessarily mean having to play second fiddle. For all her jockeying to be portrayed as an advocate of womens’ empowerment — though she is no Eleanor Roosevelt — the chatelaine of the California coast is still chiefly known for her marital choices and various  struggles with reality. 

Once this latest round of quiet whining recedes, it remains to be seen what kind of wine, or new Netflix product, Ms. Markle squeezes from all those sour grapes.