Relentless Focus on ‘Resumé-Building’ Can Prove Draining for Today’s Tots

The skills children learn when organizing their own fun are the exact skills colleges and businesses want: collaboration, innovation, communication.

Hanuman Photo Studio via Pexels.com
Children at play. Hanuman Photo Studio via Pexels.com

Investors are always told to “diversify” their portfolios. Don’t put all your money in stocks — what if the market plunges? Don’t put all your money in bonds — you’ll miss the market rallies. And for God’s sake, don’t put all your money in one company.

Or, to put it an older way: Don’t put all your eggs in one basket.

Yet when it comes to our children, many of today’s parents have been told not to diversify at all. Just make them college material.

That has meant many a childhood focused on academic success and “resumé-building.” Of course, it’s great to learn how to write a persuasive essay — I’m doing that right now — and some world history. Nothing wrong with lacrosse or coding, either.

Only the time and energy — and money — being devoted to resumé-building can be draining. Meanwhile, the abilities children develop beyond the classroom or extracurricular activity could end up being the most valuable of all.

I see this in my volunteer capacity as an alumni interviewer for Yale. Over the years, I’ve interviewed more than 100 college hopefuls, and I can say that all schoolwork and grinding extracurriculars makes for some dull boys and girls.

The students I recommend are generally very excited about at least some facet of their formal education but also about something they have discovered on their own. Often something quirky.

One girl started a class on “Real World Skills” at her school after she found out her friend couldn’t sew a button on a coat.

One boy started his own website business — and if a request got too technical, he outsourced it to Russian programmers.

Another young man went to so many of his girlfriend’s younger brother’s baseball games, he eventually became the team’s coach.

Admissions officers read thousands of essays from excellent students. Those gatekeepers are looking for something extra that screams curiosity, or doggedness, or the ability to see and seize an opportunity.

The business world is seeking the same. Human resources departments say “soft skills” are what today’s labor force is lacking. In a Wall Street Journal survey of nearly 900 executives, 92 percent said “soft skills” were equally — or more — important than technical skills. The buzz is that many young employees lack the ability to collaborate, innovate, and communicate in real life.

It’s time for us parents to realize that building a fort in the woods can teach children everything they’d learn in robotics camp — and more. The children still have to gather materials, come up with a plan, execute, and test it. Often they work in teams.

Yet unlike robotics campers, the fort-builders are driven by the fierce desire to make something in the world — something adults may not ever see, comment on, or compliment. This is the “self-driven” element that psychologists are coming to recognize as crucial to self-worth and success.

The skills children learn when organizing their own fun are the exact skills colleges and businesses want: collaboration, innovation, communication. Even when they’re just drawing, or practicing free throws, they’re learning focus and perseverance. At Let Grow, the nonprofit I helm, we call these “non-robot skills” — a skillset robots don’t share.

It is becoming unusual to give children much free, unstructured, unsupervised time. When no one is teaching children something that has a name, like “chess,” that time can appear wasted.

That’s only because we haven’t trained ourselves to see all the growth going on.

Let’s allow children to “diversify” beyond the skills they get in one formal setting or another. The future — and maybe even Yale — awaits.

Creators.com


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