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Reader comment on:
Courts Gets Case Of Grandparental Visitation Rights

Submitted by Kevin, Sep 10, 2008 13:58

To accommodate all parties' interests, particularly the children's, regarding grandparent rights and in light of our State's Family Court practices in this area I would propose that we each push to change NY's Family Law as noted below. These provision would have helped me and my boys after I lost me wife to cancer (see my earlier submitted comment). Grandchild Support. When one of a child's or children's parents dies, the child(ren)'s surviving custodial parent may petition for and shall be awarded grandchild support from the deceased parent's parents (grandparents) equal to one fourth of what said grandparents would be required to pay if they where in combination the non-custodial parent of said child(ren) under the Child Support Collection Act. Said amounts shall be collected through the Child Support Collection Unit. Presumption of Visitation being in Children's Best Interest. In instances where a child's grandparents have standing to petition for visitation with their grandchildren, said grandparents shall have a presumption that at least minimal visitation with the children would be in the children's best interests, but said presumption may be overcome by testimony or other evidence showing: (i) a pattern of efforts on the part of the grandparent(s) to undermine the child(ren)'s perceptions of the authority, character or fitness of their parent; (ii) other parent alienation efforts or potentially psychologically harmful efforts or actions on the part of the grandparent(s); (ii) physical or sexual abuse; (iii) substance abuse; (iv) moral turpitude; (v) psychological or personality disorders; (vi) or other factors the court deems appropriate. Consideration of Fit Parent's Wishes. In all instances were a court is determining whether to award grandparental visitation and how much visitation to grant, the wishes of a fit parent must be given paramount consideration in light of said parent's obligations to support, care for and raise his or her children and in light of the fundamental right of a fit parent to determine within the constraints of the law how best to raise his or her child(ren). Any award of grandparent visitation shall: (i) accommodate a fit parent's decisions regarding the child(ren)'s schooling, choice of where to live, religious practices and upbringing, and inter-generational involvement in children's normal activities; (ii) include automatic standing for the parent to petition for modification of the award to accommodate intended relocation for change of employment, remarriage or other significant event or change, and to the extent practicable be structured such that modification is not required to address such eventualities; and (iii) include provision for equitable sharing of transportation costs associated with transferring the child(ren) for visitation. Denial of Visitation with Leave to Apply again in Three Years. In addition to potential standing provided by change of circumstance, the court may as part of an Order denying grandparent visitation grant automatic standing to the grandparent(s) so the Court's Order may be revisited upon petition filed by the grandparent(s) three or more years after the date of the earlier Order.


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Other reader comments on this article

Comment By Date

To accommodate all parties' interests, particularly the children's, regarding grandparent rights and in light of our State's Family Court practices...

Kevin

Sep 10, 2008 13:58

I hope the courts provide clarity regarding the weight fit parent's views should be afforded and who has the burden... [MORE]

Kevin

Sep 8, 2008 09:52

My own mother took me to court for custody because I was in an accident and could barely walk. You... [MORE]

Erica

Feb 19, 2008 05:23

The law deffinalty needs defined. I am a firm believer in family involvement. However, my own GPV case is a... [MORE]

klynch

Feb 7, 2008 12:47

Have you thought of adoption. The law states that the grandparents rights automatically terminate in the event of an adoption.... [MORE]

Erica

Feb 19, 2008 05:43

only some states will turminate a visitation if an adoption takes place. However the parents of the decseaded parent can... [MORE]

klynch

Mar 15, 2008 00:10

Advocate: 1. One that argues for a cause; a supporter or defender: an advocate of civil rights. 2. One that pleads... [MORE]

Jennifer

Jan 20, 2008 12:50

We aren't mad at your particular situation. We are mad at the Grandparents who are trying to control their adult... [MORE]

Erica

Feb 21, 2008 13:23

If mothers and fathers were more responsble today, maybe grandparents would not need to intervene. Bottom line is concern about... [MORE]

tony

Dec 25, 2007 17:54

I couldn't agree with you more Tony! My son and daughter in law prefer to buy themselves expensive clothing, New... [MORE]

Lucy

Dec 26, 2007 10:44

If what you're saying is true, how bout you call DCFS? [MORE]

Erica

Feb 21, 2008 13:24

I believe that most people feel that when a child is in danger someone needs to step on on the... [MORE]

Krista

Mar 10, 2008 23:07

I absolutely agree that it's a control issue. My son is 3 and his dad passed away last summer, now... [MORE]

Kellie

Mar 13, 2008 11:40

Mandy, Your in laws can not take your child if you are a fit mom, You need to report them... [MORE]

lucy

Dec 23, 2007 18:03

We went to court in October. Come to find out my parents don't just want visitation anymore, they are sueing... [MORE]

Brandie

Nov 30, 2007 16:36

When my nephew was a year old, my sister and her husband divorced. She started abusing alcohol and drugs and... [MORE]

Katie

Sep 8, 2007 00:52

Recently our son decided to stray. While we tried to be supportive, we cannot "support" this kind of behavior. We... [MORE]

grandparent

Sep 8, 2007 08:20

You have no right to sue for visitation unless you can prove that the childrens parent(s) are unstable. If your... [MORE]

susan

Oct 12, 2007 18:17

I've wrote before.. but i want to say... when the parents are not "fit" they are abusive or drug/alcohol addidicts.... [MORE]

Michelle

Dec 3, 2007 15:17

Maybe you should do some research on grandparents rights, It all depends on the circumstances, Do more research/ [MORE]

Lucy

Dec 13, 2007 20:11

my in-laws have kept my child away from me twice. My husband and I are going through a divorce. He... [MORE]

mandi

Dec 23, 2007 05:00

My daughter is a drug addict with a 3 year old son. She went to rehab and was doing very... [MORE]

Cindy

Jan 23, 2008 19:14

My ex- wife and her parenents have taken me to court for visitation. How do I stop it? 1st My ex... [MORE]

Help

Jan 26, 2008 14:01

It is not an issue of rights of parents or grandparents alone. It is also a question of the rights... [MORE]

raj

Mar 11, 2008 20:52

My parents are taking me to court for Grandparent visitations. They were seeing my son every other weekend when my... [MORE]

Brandie

Jun 28, 2007 19:34

my daughter was taken by my motherinlaw 17 years ago. she told lies on me and her father to get... [MORE]

deborah

Sep 5, 2007 13:41

My fiance' and I have been together just over 2 years now. He has a 9 year old daughter, I... [MORE]

Brandee

Sep 10, 2007 19:57

Hi, Your story is my story.... We went threw the same thing... My mom and dad took me to court. They... [MORE]

Michelle

Nov 30, 2007 15:46

Something happened, we don't know what, and my Aunt and Mother came up with reasons to criticize our parenting- my wife's... [MORE]

Joe

Dec 25, 2007 13:09

A young mother suddenly passes away from illness. Fathers who have not been involved in their childrens lives, over due... [MORE]

LV4TCSJT

Jun 16, 2007 00:26

My daughter showed up one day and left the baby with me and the biological father. Over a period of... [MORE]

Don't Judge if you haven't been there

Jun 9, 2007 22:59

this is about grandparents who sue because they can! Or sue because they just dont like the parent and want... [MORE]

kel

Aug 31, 2007 12:48

This week my parents filed for cutody of my child. My husband and I separated about 16 months ago and... [MORE]

Terica

Nov 7, 2007 13:00

So you're a grandparent that had to step up due to a lousy daughter? How about instead of bashing your... [MORE]

Erica

Feb 19, 2008 05:48

New Jersey and Maryland Supreme Courts got it right. They ruled in favor of the parent's fundamental right to decide... [MORE]

Anonymous

Jan 14, 2007 01:09

I just got back from court today and have been fishing around the internet . Our next court day is... [MORE]

larry

Aug 28, 2007 13:16

i feel your pain. we are a low in come family making it on our own . my parents filed... [MORE]

Krystal

Nov 12, 2007 04:16

In rulings just this week both the Maryland Supreme Court and the New Jersey Supreme Courts have found for parents... [MORE]

K. Bearden

Jan 12, 2007 21:09

opposed to this legislation are those that have lost their third party visitation cases. Correct Lisa, Karen and Andrea? [MORE]

Jack

Jan 8, 2007 21:25

Grandparents who sue for visitation obviously are opposed to allowing their adult child the same right they enjoyed raising their... [MORE]

Jill

Jan 9, 2007 00:26

Taking healthy families to court, at tremendous expense to the family, further degrading them with psychological evaluations, violating their privacy... [MORE]

K. Bearden

Jan 9, 2007 08:40

To Jack- Who better to advocate for how wrong this kind of legislation is than those who have had their family... [MORE]

K. Bearden

Jan 9, 2007 19:53

When there is an issue of parents using drugs and alcohol and the children not getting proper care. Grandparents intervention... [MORE]

Margarita Ladage-Johnson

Jan 12, 2007 11:35

Perhaps the courts could spend a lot more time and effort helping those abused and neglected children if our tax... [MORE]

K. Bearden

Jan 12, 2007 20:00

Drugs, alcohol abuse, and child abuse are serious problems best addressed by custody suits. In these cases a fit grandparent... [MORE]

Olivia

Jan 14, 2007 02:25

Have you ever had to deal with a drug addicted parent abandonding a 2 month old baby? I have. I... [MORE]

GerTie

Jun 9, 2007 23:34

I'm seeing a lot of grandparents reply with the "don't judge if you haven't been there" defense. However, you are... [MORE]

K George

Jun 21, 2007 03:11

Both of my granddaughter's parents are drug addicts. One is a career criminal, now going back (again) for 3 years.... [MORE]

Kathleen Ambrose

Nov 25, 2007 14:08

I totally agree about letting our children raise their own kids (our grandkids) without grandparents interfering but what happens when... [MORE]

Lucy

Dec 12, 2007 16:30

Grandparents controlling their children? What planet are you on? I seen more parents controlling their children grandparents! Believe me I... [MORE]

Lucy

Dec 13, 2007 19:30

Usually on this day I would of been all excited about tomorrow *Christmas eve* I would had all my presents... [MORE]

Lucy

Dec 23, 2007 10:57

Happy new year everyone! Well, Christmas and 2007 has past and still haven't been able to see my grandkids, I'm... [MORE]

Lucy

Jan 3, 2008 12:31

Visitation by grandparents in neither a right nor a previlege. It is a duty to ensure that their children and... [MORE]

Raj

Mar 11, 2008 21:45

This is surreal. Whoever thought this stuff up was nuts. On what legal basis are these grandparents suing fit parents?... [MORE]

Andy

Jan 8, 2007 01:49

I completely agree with your comment. This law completely infringes on the rights of the parents and does nothing but put... [MORE]

Suffering as we speak

Jun 15, 2007 11:29

have you found a way for us to stop this? [MORE]

Kel

Aug 30, 2007 20:54

I am just so sickened by this law and what it is doing to me and my boys! lets get... [MORE]

mom

Sep 11, 2007 14:00

The most recent update of the law was effective Jan. of 2007. My own mother has taken me to court... [MORE]

Erica

Feb 19, 2008 05:40

Legal basis is always dependent on needs of time, and is decided by the society. Today, with the exploding divorce... [MORE]

Raj

Mar 11, 2008 22:32

Nice little article however my daughter's father is dead and grandma refuses to see my daughter unless I am not... [MORE]

suffering as we speak

Mar 13, 2008 19:43

I'm a grandpatent - and - right; laws need to protect the children. That is why all laws giving court... [MORE]

Donna

Jan 5, 2007 15:37

I am responding in general to all the comments made on this site. You parents need to get a grip.... [MORE]

Pogie

Jun 22, 2007 19:04

My soon to be ex-husbands parents have kept our child from seeing me. They flat out lie to me about... [MORE]

mandi

Dec 23, 2007 05:25

I would like to express my concern regarding court ordered Grandparent Visitation and New York Domestic Relations Law 72.... [MORE]

Mom2-3

Jan 5, 2007 15:09

I can't believe what I am reading. My husband and I spent over a year fighting off abusive grandparents, being... [MORE]

Renee

Mar 22, 2007 19:21

I'm in court right now trying to fight off my ex-mother in law to have any visitation with my daughter... [MORE]

Dee

Apr 12, 2007 14:30

I respect the wishes of those parents who don't wish their children to have any contact with their grandparents. In... [MORE]

zenaida ortiz

May 7, 2007 16:18

I am just so angry and upset! my life has been hell! I am broke and we have not even... [MORE]

mom

Sep 11, 2007 14:03

I think you are only telling your side of the story, I'm sure there was a reason why your children... [MORE]

Lucy

Dec 15, 2007 12:03

When parents take an action that damages the "love" bond that exists in the heart, grandparents/significant others are left to... [MORE]

Paul in NY

Dec 29, 2007 14:15

i just read this article because i was recently served with order to show cause documents by my husband's parents... [MORE]

jaime

Jan 28, 2008 21:29

I've been divorced for 4 years, my ex and I share custody of our 3 children.. I know that he... [MORE]

Jodi

Feb 9, 2008 09:00

I would do everything possible to wait until they get out of school before moving. If you agree to their... [MORE]

Erica

Feb 21, 2008 13:18

VIctim of Domestic violence, my daughter was assaulted at age 3 by her biological father, I have been in family... [MORE]

Kathy

Mar 21, 2008 13:54

"Under the provision of the state's Domestic Relations Law, grandparents usually are allowed to petition for visitation only when one... [MORE]

Polly

Jan 5, 2007 10:36

Grandparents have endangered their grandson by hiding son's drug addiction and now want visitation when always solidly criticizing mother (who,... [MORE]

Nancy

Nov 23, 2007 21:39

My situation is the same as this artical! Is there a way that I can divorce my parents to keep... [MORE]

Faith

Mar 20, 2008 21:03

It is true that the USSC Justices issued six opinions in Troxel v. Granville, 530 U.S. 57 (2000). However, there... [MORE]

Karen A. Wyle

Jan 5, 2007 10:27

There are only 5 states that have adopted a harm standard as a prerequisite for granting third party visitation. [MORE]

Jack

Jan 8, 2007 21:09


[w/response by The New York Sun Editors]There seems to be much confusion about the true nature of the Grandparent Visitation laws. If so many grandparents are... [MORE]

Mary

Jan 5, 2007 04:21

How about us parents stick together and DO SOMETHING!I am going through this process with a grandmother who wasn't even... [MORE]

Kel

Aug 30, 2007 20:51

I have to protect my kids from their grandparents. The grandparents raise two of my husbands nieces and they refuse... [MORE]

Tammi

Jan 26, 2008 11:59


[w/response by The New York Sun Editors]Grandparent visitation laws only allow visitation. They are not meant to "protect" children from drug-using, abusive parents. All states have... [MORE]

Lisa S

Jan 4, 2007 23:49

should consider the trauma inflicted upon them when selfish parents irresponsibly decide to terminate a cherished relationship. [MORE]

Jack

Jan 8, 2007 21:16

My comments illustrate what children and parents must go through when they are sued because a grandparent cannot live with... [MORE]

Lisa S.

Jan 9, 2007 13:37

CHERISHED is a very subjective word. [MORE]

barbara

Jan 9, 2007 15:30

Parents who truly care for their children and grandchildren don't traumatize and suck a family dry using the court system... [MORE]

K. Bearden

Jan 9, 2007 20:05

My own parents took me to court for visitation of my children 5 years after i got divorced. They were... [MORE]

Michelle

Nov 30, 2007 15:31


[w/response by The New York Sun Editors]Grandparent visitation ONLY affects FIT parents. When a parenta is unfit then grandparent visitation will NOT help the child and there... [MORE]

Dauger

Jan 4, 2007 22:20

My grandson is the victim of grandparent's rights. Yes, I said a victim. This is not about a cooking baking... [MORE]

Deborah Custer

Jan 5, 2007 14:23

when the decision to terminate the grandparent relationship is purely motivated by the parent's self-serving interests, interests that run contrary... [MORE]

Jack

Jan 9, 2007 14:47

Jack you have seem to have nominated yourself guro of a child's best interest! Not to mention having the need... [MORE]

John

Jan 9, 2007 23:48

I live in NJ and was sued by my mother for GPV 2.5 yrs ago. After spending $30K, the NJ... [MORE]

Valerie

Jan 12, 2007 09:02

SINCE YOUR SON HAS CUSTODY OF YOUR GRANDSON I PRESUME YOU HAVE CONTACT WITH YOUR GRANDSON IF NOT WHY? MY... [MORE]

GRANDMA X 5-1

Apr 11, 2007 12:24

It's about time someone tell the truth about grandparent bashing. There seems to be a trend whether the parents are... [MORE]

CAROLENA

Apr 14, 2007 22:00

Grandparent visitation is a nasty thing when it's used against fit parents. I am a stepmother, although my child is... [MORE]

Keri

Jun 6, 2007 14:31

I have a 4 yr old grandaughter who has lived in my house for three years and now my daughter... [MORE]

Robin

Jul 17, 2007 10:50

I am a single mom raising 2 children. My mother and I have never had a good relationship. She watched... [MORE]

Speer

Aug 31, 2007 16:18


[w/response by The New York Sun Editors]No Grandparent in their right mind would dream of interfering this way. When you do the math what is left... [MORE]

Jennifer

Jan 4, 2007 22:19


[w/response by The New York Sun Editors]The ultimate right to children lies with their parents. That is the way it is and the way it should... [MORE]

candace

Jan 4, 2007 18:06

I am a child advocate and am working with Legislation to Ensure all Grandchildren get to visit and know the... [MORE]

Brenda

Jan 4, 2007 11:59

This would be the adult thing to do if the Grandparent knew their place in the family unit. When the... [MORE]

Tara

Jan 5, 2007 15:21

So what you are advocating is placing the child in the middle of what is a hostile situation? Not all... [MORE]

K. Bearden

Jan 9, 2007 20:17

I had been in my grandchilds live up until last May of this year. I had tried to be helpful... [MORE]

busywoman

Oct 20, 2007 03:00

I couldn't agree with you more, So wrong for parents to use their kids as weapons, The only time they... [MORE]

Lucy

Dec 13, 2007 22:42

Brenda, You are on the right track. Grandparents, in the current context of exploding divorce rates, youth violence, premature sex and... [MORE]

Raj

Mar 11, 2008 23:46

The courts are allowing the estranged parent of grandchild to more or less BRIBE the Grandparents. They are using children... [MORE]

CLAUD

Jan 3, 2007 23:16

1/5/07 This certainly doesn't apply in my case. My son died 14 months after our granddaughter was born. We only asked... [MORE]

Lois A. Galloway

Jan 5, 2007 19:07

Claud: As a victim of a vindictive mentally ill estranged father in law who has come after my children after... [MORE]

Annie

Jan 9, 2007 00:27

It's ridiculous that you expect any sympathy, as Dr. Phil would say, "How's that working for you?" Did you really... [MORE]

K. Bearden

Jan 9, 2007 20:02

we are pursuing our wishes to see our the 6 and 4 yr. old grandkids through the courts as I... [MORE]

pam

Nov 16, 2007 03:15

Grandparent Visitation seems to be coming a "hot topic". I have been working on this issue through legislation. What seems... [MORE]

Andrea K.

Jan 3, 2007 22:44

I disagree with the AG's commentary that our statute is constitutional because it can be "construed" to be giving parents... [MORE]

Karen

Jan 5, 2007 20:00

in "complete disregard for your children". [MORE]

Jack

Jan 8, 2007 21:22

And suing your adult child is in complete disrespect of your adult child's abilty and right to parent as he/she... [MORE]

Helen

Jan 9, 2007 00:07

It's all about respect for the parent. [MORE]

Jack

Jan 9, 2007 14:51

A poster wrote that, "it is all about respect for the parent". To a large degree the poster is correct.... [MORE]

Mary

Jan 10, 2007 12:30

Jack, It's funny you go there. You are the parent of the child's parent, right? But somehow in your twisted perception... [MORE]

K. Bearden

Jan 12, 2007 09:25

The fact of the matter is that, to begin with, divorce does not enrich a child's life. [MORE]

Antoninus

Feb 15, 2007 23:30

A parent in the good old U.S. of A. no longer has rights to their children. This is true due... [MORE]

Warrior

Mar 16, 2007 13:45

ok...in a nitshell...I am a divorced mother of 3..I share primary residance of my 3 children with my ex husband...at... [MORE]

Jodi

Jan 25, 2008 20:26

my girlfriend and i just had a little boy on jan. 31. there is a chance that he isn't biologically... [MORE]

daryl

Mar 4, 2008 16:52

I also filed for visitation after reporting a daughter who had abused drugs and alcohol for 26 years. The courts... [MORE]

margarita

Jan 3, 2007 15:26

If all grandparents were cookie baking, let's go fishing old people, this would be a no-brainer...but they're NOT. These same... [MORE]

barbara

Jan 5, 2007 11:15

When you protect the child's parents you are securing the child's future. The law must protect the parents as the... [MORE]

K. Bearden

Jan 9, 2007 20:23

Ironic isn't it that you didn't seem to acquire this opinion until after you were done raising your kids. If... [MORE]

K. Bearden

Jan 12, 2007 09:36

The nuclear family is destroyed once the divorce occurs and one of the parents (usually the father) is excluded from... [MORE]

Antoninus

Feb 15, 2007 23:41

How horrible!!! Some grandparents are not worthy of seeing their grandchildren!!! We are in the middle of a similar situation... [MORE]

Pam

May 14, 2007 18:14

How can we stop this? i just got took to court by my boys paternal grandparents because their son my... [MORE]

Rebecca S

Jun 14, 2007 09:00

I have 5 beautiful grandchildren. I am not allowed at this time to see 3 of them due to my... [MORE]

Sharon

Sep 6, 2007 07:35

There are several comments about irresponsible parents doing drugs and/or dropping their kids off on grandma's doorsterp. Clearly irresponsible. Clearly... [MORE]

Olivia

Sep 27, 2007 12:27

I have read your essay and I can tell you have let your bitterness blind you and perhaps you are... [MORE]

Beverly

Nov 15, 2007 19:55

Haven't seen both grandchidren since July3,2007. Going to court and daughter doesn't show 3x. Whats this, is not contempt? Have... [MORE]

pam

Nov 16, 2007 03:37

I totally understand, I've been in court with my mother four years, at this point I'm losing my home and... [MORE]

Lisa Wright-Clegg

Jan 16, 2008 22:41

There are some comments that i have read about other laws protecting children who actually are in unfit environments, It... [MORE]

liz

Feb 4, 2008 19:45

There are some comments that i have read about other laws protecting children who actually are in unfit environments, It... [MORE]

liz

Feb 4, 2008 20:45

Maybe they are trying to Protect them from the hostility that is obously there right now, i think it is... [MORE]

liz

Feb 4, 2008 21:25

What do you mean by "too harsh", The question is is she physically or mentally abusive? For my childs sake... [MORE]

liz

Feb 4, 2008 23:10

Grandparent and Third Party Visitation laws are about visitation, not custody. In the tragic situations where children are being neglected... [MORE]

Jim Pistole

Feb 24, 2008 12:38

What is not clear is as to why The parents of children, who themselves are children of the grandparents against... [MORE]

Raj

Mar 12, 2008 00:59

Rebecca, Are you bitter over the grandparents having time with their grandson at this time in their lives. Thew are... [MORE]

abby

Mar 18, 2008 22:02

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